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After my son Brandon was born, I had the opportunity to be a stay-at-home mom for almost three years. During that beautiful time, my desire to have a lovely and put-together home grew even greater. I decided to sign up for a mail-order book club and selected a cookbook from an up-and-coming author, Ina Garten.
The title of her cookbook intrigued me: The Barefoot Contessa Cookbook.
The Most Glorious Cookbook I’d Ever Read
The day it arrived in the mail I was instantly smitten with Ina. The glorious photos of every recipe delighted me as I devoured this coffee-table-worthy book.
The story of how Ina left a fascinating government job in Washington DC to take a big risk on taking over a little gourmet shop in The Hamptons was riveting. What courage!
Never had I heard of The Hamptons, but when I found out that Martha Stewart was a regular customer, I was all ears. Her passion for quality ingredients, mixed with an air of French sophistication and high society, was just what I needed, because I too was a “barefoot contessa”.
I Wanted to be a Barefoot Contessa Too
I was indeed barefoot with a two year-old, a kindergartener and a Pampered Chef whisk in my hand. Cooking had been my gift since I was a 10-year old poring over my mom’s Betty Crocker cookbook.
Everything from Parker’s Split Pea Soup and Broccoli with Garlic to Outrageous Brownies and Coconut Cupcakes was on my dinner table. I dreamed of being half the hostess Ina was, with hydrangea centerpieces and captivating dinner guests.
Since that time, Ina has sold millions of cookbooks, become an international Food Network star and an American entrepreneurial success story. She still humbly calls herself “just a cook” with no formal training.
My Visit to The Hamptons
Two decades since reading The Barefoot Contessa Cookbook, I had the honor of visiting East Hampton with my dear friend Julieann, who grew up in Sag Harbor. When she took me by Ina Garten’s original shop, I cried. The shop is no longer open, but I could feel the memories of the once bustling specialty gourmet shop where celebrities and locals noshed on Ina’s luscious Lemon Bars.
Ina Garten is the QUEEN of the fabulous dinner party.
These are the 7 tips I learned from the best hostess of all time.
1. People are more important than food.
Ina loves people. She lives to show love to her husband and friends through incredible, yet simple foods.
If you’ve had the pleasure of watching her Food Network show, The Barefoot Contessa, you quickly see her love for her husband of 50 years, Jeffrey. She dotes on him like a newlywed. Jeffrey, who is a highly successful Yale professor, is completely adorable and the recipient of Ina’s amazing meals. One of her many cookbooks is Cooking for Jeffrey.
She always makes it about the people. Ina is loyal. She continues to endorse her favorite local shops; like her dear friends Anna Pump, who owned Loaves & Fishes; and Kathleen King, formerly of Tate’s Bake Shop.
Ina’s list of celebrity friends is a mile long: Gwyneth Paltrow, Taylor Swift, Jennifer Garner, Martha Stewart and Katie Couric.
Ina’s best traits, in my opinion, are her loyalty, her honor, and her friendship.
2. Simple, delicious meals are better than fussy foods.
Delicious foods don’t have to be complicated or expensive like she explains in her “How Easy is That?” cookbook. Ina has the gift of taking simple foods and elevating them to the next level. Her Chicken Salad Veronique uses fresh tarragon to make an ordinary dish extraordinary.
When our daughter Brittany was in high school, she decided to make Ina’s Outrageous Brownies for her geography class. That secret ingredient of coffee makes this recipe the best brownie on the planet. Make sure you use this 18×12″ non-stick baking pan for best results.
They were such a hit with the students that the teenage boys told Brittany they would pay her for her brownies. She had a budding little brownie business for a while until the school shut her down for selling “unregulated baked goods”.
3. Prioritize quality of food over quantity of food.
When you have a choice to buy fresh, local ingredients, do it. You may not have an entire herb garden in your backyard, but you can have a small basil plant in your kitchen to liven up your pizzas and pesto.
A simple roasted chicken with sautéed vegetables and a store-bought treat like Jeni’s Ice Cream is better than fast food any night of the week.
When I first started having parties, I used to think I had to make every dish from scratch. Why? Because I wanted everyone to think what a great cook I was. It was exhausting. I was a stressed-out hostess preparing way too many dishes. There was always enough food left over to feed all of Nashville.
Ina humbled me. She made me realize that’s it’s not about me. It’s about the other person. She humbly says, “I’m just a cook,” and, “How easy is that?” to empower all of us to believe that we can do it too.
And as a “cook,” Ina has spun her genius charm into earthy recipes for the world to enjoy and pass down.
4. A happy hostess is more fun than a stressed one. Get help.
Ina Garten has the knack of not over-complicating meals. She would rather include store-bought food when it’s appropriate or just a few simple ingredients. This gives her more time and energy to be a great hostess.
When she needs help, she asks for it. It’s about being available and present when your guests arrive, not stuck in the kitchen panicking over cook-to-order omelets.
So don’t fly it alone. If I need a wonderful dessert fast, I can always count on my friend Alena Vaughn of Triple Crown Bakery to have incredible cakes. My favorite is her coconut bee cakes.
5. Set a lovely table.
Setting a beautiful table shows you care about your dinner guests. Whether it’s small party or a large one, show your love by using the good dishes and linens. Fresh flowers are essential, and place cards are recommended. Read my post How to Set a Lovely Table.
6. Flowers make everything more joyful.
Bringing fresh flowers indoors is one of my steps 7 Steps to a Lovely Home. When hosting a dinner party, fresh flowers are essential.
I love going to my local grocer and picking up some discounted pink, coral, blush or ivory roses that are in full bloom. I usually cut the stems shorter and put them in a cute vase or pitcher. Sometimes I will add fresh eucalyptus or other greenery.
Amelia’s Flower Truck is my favorite Nashville floral supplier. We visit their Franklin shop at The Factory for gorgeous fresh stems. Ina Garten always supports her local florists.
These bouquets are perfect for your dinner party and typically last another 3-5 days to add more loveliness to your home.
7. Love & laughter are contagious.
My favorite thing about Ina Garten is her laugh. It is contagious. She always has a humorous response.
Most of my life I took myself too seriously. Ina never does. She laughs at herself and the whole world laughs with her.
Oh, to be invited to her dinner parties, just for the conversation alone (not to mention the food)!
Thank you, dear Ina – the most lovely barefoot contessa, for inspiring me to be a better wife, friend, hostess and cook. I have every cookbook. I can’t wait for the next!
My Bonus Tip #1:
Take a photo of each guest who comes.
Thanks to the invention of the selfie and mobile phones, you can have a photo collection instead of just a signed guest book.
With everyone who comes to our dinner parties, we make a point to take a photo with them in our foyer. The lighting is always great, and the memories are even better!
My Bonus Tip #2:
If you are invited guest at a dinner party, make sure to:
- Bring a small gift to the host/hostess (flowers, wine or a great book).
- Keep the conversation light and fun; nobody wants to be seated next to someone who is overly political, negative or gross.
- Offer to help clean up.
- Don’t overstay your welcome. Know when to leave. If the hostess is yawning, that’s your cue.
I would love for to email me your dinner party photos along with your tablescapes.
I’m here for YOU!
Much love & joy,
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How to Set a Lovely Table in 7 Joyful Steps